A person cannot give a crust to the Lord without receiving a loaf in return

bonjour tout le monde! this week was crazy eventful so prepare yourself for this one...

Monday night we decided to do a few less active pass bys. we ring into the building and Catherine (the less active) answered the intercom! We asked if we could share a message and she said she was too busy. then she yelled to someone in the background that the missionaries were here. and then a woman leans out the window and starts yelling at us, so I said goodbye to Catherine and said maybe we'd try another day. We began to walk away from the lady yelling at us and then we rounded the corner and realized she was running after us!! I thought she was just trying to get rid of us so I just start running to the metro and Sr Walton was right behind and then all the sudden I hear her scream and look back and the woman had grabbed Sr Walton by the arm! So I turn around ready to defend my companion and the woman is yelling she isnt going to hit us in French. So we stop and listen to her yell and scream at us in French and I was SO confused as to what she wanted. Finally we calmed her down and it turns out she was the less active's daughter! So we are definitely not going back now. We walked away and I just started laughing and said well this is a good story. and Sr Walton promptly burst into to tears. but she laughed about it the next day so all is good :) Oh Villeneuve D'ascq...the people we meet and the experiences we have here.

Tuesday we had a rdv with a woman the Elders had met and her husband joined us in our lesson and we ended up teaching them the entire first lesson and left a Book of Mormon with them! Augustine, the wife accepted a soft invite, her husband Mohammed was a little more skeptical but promised to read the Book and find out from himself. It was so cool! We are going to pass them to the Elders though because they are in their area. But I am so happy for them and I know that as soon as they read that Book they will find the truth!!

Wednesday morning we went to have a rdv with Laurence finally. We had met her a few weeks ago while we were doing less active pass bys in Hellemmes. She had met with missionaries before and has even been to church! So we went over and she fed us breakfast and was such a delight! She is so wonderful and really open. She knows all about our church and stopped meeting with the missionaries because she didnt think she could change to our lifestyle but she is ready to learn again and wants to come back to church because she loves the feeling there more than her church! I cant wait to go back again next week!

Thursday I was in Bruxelles with Soeur Pettingill whom I adore! We had such a wonderful time together and I received so many answers to my prayers. In the morning we went out contacting in the freezing cold, we were shivering and shaking as we talked to people it was so cold! But we met a woman named Leila. She didn't speak French very well but she was so kind. From what she was telling us she sounded Muslim so we asked if we could leave her with a prayer. She asked me to say it, so I spoke very slowly so she could understand the French and when we said Amen I looked into her face and there were tears streaming down her face. She shook my hand, thanked us and then walked away. And Sr Pettingill and I turned the other way and I looked at the cobble stones beneath my feet and felt the crisp cutting Belgian breeze and just began to cry too. Because THAT is why I came on a mission. To share God's love with His children. And I was so so grateful that Heavenly Father saw fit to use me as an instrument in His hands to remind His daughter of His love. He used me to reach out to His children even though I am not perfect. That is all I've ever wanted, just to be able to be an instrument in His hands and help His lost children and that moment just filled me with so much joy because it was such an answer to my prayers!

Friday night we met with Oceane. She is getting baptized on the 30th!! We finally worked out with everyone the hours and schedules so we will be rushing home from our Soeur Conference in Paris (I am so ridiculously excited for that conference!) it is going to be a beautiful day! We were talking with Oceane on Sunday and she was expressing a few concerns and then she said you know it doesnt matter. I've been waiting to get baptized for so long and I know that it is going to make me so so happy. She is such a gem. I cant wait for her to finally experience the moment she's been waiting for so long!

I almost forgot! Thursday night we met with Justine. We met her porting a few weeks ago and we finally met with her and it was a lesson missionaries live for. She was so golden! So sincere and humble and the Spirit was so strong as we shared our stories of how we came on a mission and how we came to know for ourselves that God was there and that His love was real. It was incredible. I felt so much love for her and I knew how happy Heavenly Father was that we were there with her telling her the truth! We taught her how to pray and invited her to try as well. She promised to try later that night. Sunday night we got a text. She asked us to take her off our contact list and cancelled our rdv. I felt my heart break into a thousand pieces. She was so close! But I know that as missionaries we help people along their spiritual journey back to God and for Justine she just needed us at that moment and she'll be ready again one day to meet with the missionaries. I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for her, I love her so much and I know God loves her more. So He will take care of her :) 

This morning I was studying repentance and I loved the scripture in D&C 18:10-13 Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God; For, behold, the Lord your Redeemer suffered death in the flesh; wherefore he suffered the pain of all men, that all men might repent and come unto him. And he hath risen again from the dead, that he might bring all men unto him, on conditions of repentance. And how great is his joy in the soul that repenteth! The Lord is so merciful and He is just waiting for us to come to Him! As I studied this morning I just really felt how much God loves me and how incredibly merciful He is. Not only with my sins but also my weaknesses. And that is why He can use me to do good even though I am not even close to being perfect and that fills me with so much joy. I have learned so many wonderful things on my mission about the Atonement and repentance and the Savior's love and I know that Heavenly Father loves us so so much even though we have so many weaknesses and we mess up sometimes. this mission has taught me so much about learning to accept myself, flaws and all and I cannot thank my Heavenly Father enough for letting me have the opportunity to meet so many beautiful souls who have changed me forever!

Ah i am running out of time. i wish i could tell you everything!  I love you all so much. I love my mission so much and I love the Lord. 

thank you so much for your support and prayers!

avec beaucoup d'amour soeur alicia hawkes 

Tracting in a French Neighborhood.

French Cathedrals are breathtaking!

It was so cold I wanted to cry.The only solution? Gauffres and hot chocolate :) oh I miss Belgium..

Let us love in not only word and tongue but also in deed and in truth. -1 John 3:18

So many things this week. Let's start from the beginning.

Monday we met with a less active right after emails and it was the first time I met her, she was really sweet and she went on and on and on about the things that have been going down in Paris and how everyone just needs to love everyone else because we are all children of God! Word. 

Then we had a mangez-vous with a family in our ward. they have four children under the age of 7 and it was SO much fun. Their kids are hilarious and SO loud. I felt like I was at home haha it was a wonderful end to P-Day.

Tuesday after district meeting we went to pick up our mini missionary Sarah!! I had actually met her in Bruxelles once so that was fun. She was an absolute delight! We went and did pass bys, porting and contacting with her that day and she LOVED it. Just ate it up! We actually ran into Justine whom we had ported into last week. We had given her the website for He is the Gift and she watched it with her two atheist friends and now they are all interested in coming to Church! miracles! it was way cool. Then on the way we contacted a woman, Melodie. She said she was Atheist but then we taught her all about prayer and testified that God would hear and answer her and then she gave us her number! It was so wonderful! i love when the Spirit comes in and just softens people right up!!

Wednesday we found out that Oceane's brother was hit by a car and would be in the hospital for an extended period of time. So we are postponing her baptism until February. We are really sad but she needs to take care of her brother right now, she'll get baptized when she's ready for sure. Please keep her and her family in your prayers!

We also had another rdv with Reine this week. She is amazing. She said she read the chapters in the Book of Mormon we gave her and that she received the confirmation that it was truly the word of God! She is so golden and loves our rdvs. She went to see her sister this weekend so she couldnt come to church but we are teaching her with a member this week so hopefully that will help motivate her to come to church!

Thursday morning we went with the Elders to meet with a woman they had found. Her name is Asia and she was raised Muslim but she is searching for the truth. She is so sincere and so desperate to find out what God's will is for her. She has studied with several different religions but hasnt found anything to satsify her yet, I am so grateful for the opportunity to help her on her journey and I really pray that she finds what she is looking for as she reads the Book of Mormon and learns more with us!

Friday we were supposed to do service but she cancelled so we went searching for less actives with no success. I don't know why but everyone moves and doesn't leave a forwarding address! Ca me derange. I just want to bring people happiness and hope! but we did find a new amie! Her name is Mael and she is a gem. She's African and really believing and is so excited to come to church with us next week! She told us a story of a woman she met who was really racist, and Mael was like "well fine. I love myself the way I am even if I'm not the same color as you! God made me this way so I am perfect, just the way I am" then she proceeded to go off on a rant about how we each are perfect in our own way and i just loved it! haha what a wonderful way to think. In all honesty it is true. I am perfect because God made me exactly who I am, flaws and all. What a nice thought :)

On Saturday I went on exchange with Soeur Kemp here in Lille because her companion was really sick. So I left my dear Sr Walton at home and went out to teach all of the Lille amies. Their secteur is blowing up with people, they are crazy busy and it is wonderful!  We taught a beautiful girl from Cameroon, she has had the Book of Mormon for a matter of weeks and she has already finished 1st Nephi! She was raised Catholic so she had a lot of questions about prayer, she couldn't understand the idea that prayer is actually a conversation with Heavenly Father. It was so neat for me to talk to her about it and be able to testify that God truly hears and answers our prayers. She ate up everything I was saying and the Spirit was so strong, she said a beautiful beautiful prayer at the end. Those moments are my favorite. When I teach someone and the Spirit just testifies so strongly and then hearing them pray for the first time truly believing that a Heavenly Parent is listening. I absolutely love that. Being a missionary is the best!!

Then we went with the Elders to give a less active a blessing and she is so cool!! She has a really painful illness right now and she was so happy anyway and went on about how God gives us trials so we can prove ourselves and how grateful she was that He trusted her so much. She  was such an inspiration! She said "il faut vivre dans l'amour parce que Dieu, il est l'amour" (you must live in love! because God is love) i just loved that! what a wonderful way to live. Always in love. Love for God, for His Son and for everyone around you. Lovely. 

We met with one other amie, Laura from Mexico and set a baptismal date with her! She is so cool. Her parents have been members for five years now but it was never the right moment for her until now. As soon she started meeting with the missionaries last week she has read the Book of Mormon and prayed every single day and stopped drinking alcohol and coffee without them even asking! She is amazing!! I met so many wonderful people this week who taught me so much about the love of God!

On Sunday afternoon we went out porting and it began pouring rain and of course we forgot our umbrellas so we were soaked to the bone pretty quick! But it was fun anyway except that NO ONE wanted to listen to us, everyone was being so sassy!! But we just kept on going and praying we would find someone kind enough to let us in. But alas no one did and we eventually headed to the church to be picked by a member. The Family Carpentier had invited us for dinner and when we showed up soaking wet they immediately freaked out and gave us warm clothes, hot chocolate and crepes. They are absolute angels. I love them so much, they give us so much support and take such good care of us. I am so grateful for the members here, they are incredible!

Well. you know that quote that says, "We talk to God through prayer and He talks to us through the scriptures" this weekend I really found that to be so true!! I was really praying for answers all week long and in my studies on Sunday morning Heavenly Father answered my prayers so clearly and I was so grateful. I just want you all to know that turning to the scriptures will really give you all the answers and peace and comfort that you need! When we pray and study His word we are so much more susceptible to His Spirit and He can truly speak to us. I am so grateful for Scripture study and prayer, it has become such a lifeline to me. I am so grateful to be a missionary, I am so blessed to be here in France as a servant to the Lord! I am so so grateful.

avec amour soeur alicia hawkes

We went to a pastry shop today! it was lovely, seriously the boulangeries here are Beautiful!!

That's our mini missionary Sarah. I love her.

"If you pile up enough tomorrows, you'll find you've collected a lot of empty yesterdays"

Bonjour à tous!!

This week was so much better than last week. We had so many wonderful miracles and we were able to accomplish so many of our goals!

Monday night we went to Belgium to have FHE with a lovely family in our ward. They have a family friend Alexis living with them and he just got home from his mission a few months ago. We ate snails and Belgian fries and steak and had cake and wine that was de-alcoholized (can you say that in English...?) and Belgian chocolate. After we ate, Alexis and Soeur Walton had a sweet jam session with the piano and violin. It was so cool and such a wonderful evening, it was the perfect way to start off the week!

Tuesday after district meeting we went to a rdv but they fruged. So we decided to hop on the metro and do some contacting until our next rdv. We began talking to a beautiful African from Cameroon, her name is Reine which actually means Queen haha but she was so cool and so interested so we exchanged information and then she said,"well if you have time why don't you just come over right now?" we were like uh yes please! so we hopped on a bus with her to her appartment and all the sudden Anastasia, a member, gets on the bus and she and Reine become best friends!! Soeur Walton and I were freaking out, too perfect. We then taught Reine the retab and set another rdv. We taught her again on Saturday and it was amazing. She is so golden. She has so many questions and tries so hard to understand, we invited her to come to church but she said maybe the next week. But then! she called us Sunday morning and asked if she could come! But then her husband told her no because he is a pastor in his own church. But she told us later she will try to convince him to let her come! haha she is so incredible and I am so grateful Heavenly Father put her into our lives! We are going to teach her about the plan of salvation on Wednesday with Anastasia! I am so excited :)

On Wednesday we had one last rdv with our Australian amie Lucy before she left to go home. We invited the Lille soeurs to come too because they are all good friends and we got ice cream together and sat in a park and taught Lucy about the Savior. She is believing but was never raised going to church or anything. So we had a beautiful powerful lesson and each of us shared our testimonies of Jesus Christ and Lucy just began to cry. She said "I cant explain what I feel but it feels SO good." we explained to her that was the Holy Ghost and that she could continue to feel it as she read the Book of Mormon and prayed and went to church. She promised to look up the church when she gets home and she thanked us for everything. I love that God just places us in each others lives to give us exactly what we need. I love Lucy so much and because of the Gospel she has become so much closer to her Heavenly Father and she is so much happier!

So on Friday we sent out a mass text to our potential amies to see if we could meet with them and a ton of them texted back and we have a billion rdvs set for this week. We are packed every single day and I am so excited! Especially since this week we are receiving a mini missionary! Her name is Sarah and she is from Belgium! I am so excited she gets to be here during such a busy week, I really hope she has a wonderful experience that will make her want to serve a real mission too!

On Sunday the Elders brought us an amie to teach! Her name is Sophia and she is so cool. She showed up after Church and we gave her a tour and she was so excited to learn and know more! it was so fun and it was cool to work with the Elders, bringing everybody to Christ together! 

This coming Saturday, our amie  Oceane will be getting baptized. Her parents told her she couldn't get baptized until she was 18 so she has waited a really long time for this. I am so excited for her to finally make this step and I just pray that everything goes as planned so please keep her in your prayers! merci!

This week I read a talk from President Monson called Finding Joy in the Journey and it was exactly what I needed! He talked about living for today instead of focusing and worrying about tomorrow. As the end of my mission approaches I feel so sad and overwhelmed to think that this wonderful life-changing experience will come to an end! but this talk really helped me focus on whats important and to realize that yes I don't have a lot of time left but I still have plenty of time to do what the Lord needs me to, I just need to cherish everyday and enjoy the small things. Like the other day we ported into a family of gypsies and it was utter chaos inside, so many people everywhere, cockroaches crawling all over the walls, tons of little kids asking us tons of random questions at once and one beautiful girl, her eyes fixed on us hanging on our every word as we share our testimonies of a loving God who gave us His Son, Our Savior Jesus Christ. Its those experiences I will never forget. Porting for hours on the cold dark streets of France, laughing our heads off as we make crepes and listen to music, giving bisous to everyone as we greet them Sunday morning and praying with strangers on the street. I am so grateful for this experience, for everything Heavenly Father has given me. It's coming to a close but I'm going to try my best to make every day count and at the end I will have plenty of beautiful yesterdays rather than empty ones :) 

here's a quote President Monson shared,

“Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend … when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present—love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature, and personal pursuits that bring us [happiness]—the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience heaven on earth.”

<sup>I hope and pray this week we can all do our best to live in the moment and cherish the days that we have! Because God sent us here to have joy and we can find that joy in every single day. I love you all and I am so grateful for your love and support!!

avec beaucoup d'amour soeur alicia hawkes</sup> 

Family Fraikin

Please note my crazy eyes in the picture with the snails. I was SO excited.

we also drank wine. But there was no alcohol in it. so no worries.  I really love snails. they cook them in a yummy garlic sauce so i think its delicious but poor Sr Walton had a really hard time!! 

We found a cathedral! also another beautiful building.

France is just GORGEOUS.

That's us at our park with Lucy after our last lesson. 

Us with our less active Martine. I adore her! she started paying her tithing this week and she is planning a temple trip for the summer! i am so happy for her!

La vie est plus belle quand on croit en Dieu

Bonjour à tous!!

So the title says Life is more beautiful when you believe in God. A member said that to me this week and I just though it was so profound and so true. Because I believe in a loving, merciful Heavenly Father I know that He is always there to support me and answer my prayers. And He gives me so many blessings and tender mercies and His love makes life beautiful!

This week was wonderful but I am so glad that the holidays are finally over! haha dont get me wrong I love the holidays but it makes missionary work really hard because everyone is either out of town or with their family so it will be nice to get back to the regular swing of things and see our amies again!

So last Monday we had a rdv set with some members but they had a last minute problem so they cancelled. So we decided to do some less active pass bys in Hellemmes. We found two of the houses but they had moved, we had one left and when we got to the street, the number literally did not exist. So we wandered for a while searching for a solution when a woman stepped out of her house and we asked her if she knew the address. She went back in her house and got her coat to come search with us!! She was so nice and it turns out she has met with missionaries before and has even been to church! We never did find that less active but we were able to set a rdv with this sweet woman, miracles!!

Then for New Year's Eve we had a Raclette fete (its a French meal, LOTS of melted cheese, a varieties of meats and potatoes)  with the other soeurs and just partied. it was so much fun! and New Year's Day Soeur Walton and I stayed in our bed all day haha we wrote letters and read books and talked and laughed until five ish and we finally got ready to go with the other soeurs to diner with a member. It was really fun. I made my New Year's Resolutions which was really weird because I split them up into missionary life for the first three months and then regular life. What the what.

On Friday we went to Paris to pick up my titre de sejour which is just an identity card that says i'm legal in France so I don't have to carry around my passport. It was a great trip and besides a few hiccups with the metros it was an unusually quiet trip there and back, it was a nice change from all the dramatic trips I've had to Paris.

On Saturday we went to do less active visits with Marie-France a member in our ward. She came up to me my first Sunday and said "I have people you need to come see" so we went and visited two lovely ladies who really want to come back to church but are having a few struggles lately, it was really cool and it was apparent how much Marie France loved them, she is an inspiration to me. I know those ladies are blessed by the charity of Marie France and both of them promised to come to church next week!

Yesterday we had a beautiful miracle. We went porting in a cute neighborhood called Croix. We got a few rejections and finally one man pointed out a house down the street that we should try. We knocked on the door and a large family came to the door. We explained what we were doing in the neighborhood and they practically pulled us into their home. We told them about our message and they were so interested! they were so sincere and so open to learning and kept asking so many questions! it was so wonderful! I cant wait to see them again!

So. This morning I was reading in Mosiah about when the Lamanites come and the people of Alma panic and freak out and are really scared and Alma comes over and is like don't worry, everything is going to be fine, remember the Lord will take care of us! So they "hushed their fears and began to cry unto the Lord" and the Lamanites capture them and put them into bondage. But the Lord "seeth fit to chasten his people yea He trieth their patience and their faith" so He doesn't deliver them right away. Instead the people turn to the Lord and pray and pray and " And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord."

I LOVE that story. because sometimes I have a trial, and I feel like I've over come it and learned to change my weaknesses and then bam! there it is again! just like the lamanites and I start to panic, but then I remember all the times the Lord has helped me in the past and even though it is really hard when the Lord seeth fit to trieth my patience and faith I know without a doubt that He is there at my side to help me. I cant count the number of times this week I have knelt down in prayer pleading with my Father in Heaven for strength and power beyond my own. And every single time I feel like He gives me a great big hug and then we walk out that door and I feel angels around me bearing me up and helping me to do His work. Prayer is my lifeline. I am SO grateful to know that I can turn to my Heavenly Father whenever I need to and that He will answer without fail. He doesn't always fix it or take the problem away but through the enabling power of the Atonement I am always given the strength to move through it and I am so so grateful for that. I know that Heavenly Father loves each of us and that He only wants us to be happy, so no matter what happens in life, in the end it will help us reach our potential and give us the most happiness. I am so grateful to be a missionary and to be able to learn so many wonderful things and have my testimony refortified every single day. I am so so blessed to be here!

thank you so much for your support love and prayers. i am so grateful for each of you!!

avec beaucoup d'amour soeur alicia hawkes

Sister Hawkes and Sister Walton

Grabbing a bite to eat in Paris

This is our apartment...i adore them

It's beautiful in Paris!

Bonjour à tous!! 

Christmas was wonderful! the members absolutely spoiled us! It was a beautiful last Christmas in France! 

This week things were pretty slow because everyone was on vacation so Saturday we ended up doing five hours of finding and we didnt have any success at all. Until we were walking back to the metro on our way home. We ran into Yixaun, a beautiful chinese girl on exchange. We taught about God and prayer and asked if she wanted to learn more, she said she wasnt sure because she came from a Buddhist background and that's what was familiar to her but then we said a prayer with her and after we finished she said i want to learn more! can you come over! we were like uh yes. So we got her number and we are calling her after the holidays. I am so excited! The whole day was worth it just to meet Yixuan, she was so sincere and so open and just so awestruck with the idea that God exists and He was her loving Heavenly Father. I cant wait to teach her! 

Later that night we taught our family in Tourcoing. Ornelly and her two sons just eat up everything we tell them. They asked soo many questions about God. Cameron the younger one, asked me how he could know God actually existed. it was so neat to teach that little boy about prayer and that God would really answer him, it was such a cool experience to teach that little family how much God loves them and wants them to be happy. I cant wait for them to be baptized. 

Yesterday evening we went porting and we met the nicest people! Everyone in that neighborhood rejected us so kindly I wasnt even sad! And we met a cute little Christian family that let us in for a few minutes. We tried to teach them about the retab but Anderson, the father straight out told us that we were wrong and there was no wrong God would call another prophet and give us more scripture. Immediately I prayed thinking, i dont want to argue with this man but I have to tell him what I know to be true! Sr. Walton and I were both praying the whole time that we would be able to say what needed to be said without being argumentative. Thankfully, Heavenly Father really blessed us and it was actually really cool! I felt the Spirit working through me and I was able to testify and share scriptures with the family. They were so kind and we felt the Spirit so strongly and I pray they did too, we left them with our card and some brochures and maybe bit by bit their hearts will be softened. I am so grateful for opportunities to share my testimony with others and to be an instrument in God's hands. 

This year has been so beautiful. I was in Angers, Tours, Liege and V D'ascq. I spent my time with the most wonderful companions, members and amies. I met people I will never be able to forget and have had experiences that have compltely changed me. I feel so blessed to have spent the entire year as a servant of the Lord in France and Belgium, I am so changed by my mission and I am so so grateful for that. I am so happy that I have been to learn to rely on the Atonement of the Savior, to truly learn to speak with God through prayer and how to love people better. It has been an absolutely amazing year that has totally changed and fortified me. And I am excited to spend the next few months as a missionary too :) 

I am so grateful for each of you, for your support, your love and your prayers. I am so grateful to have people cheering me on and praying for my succes, it means so so much to me. God is so kind to put so many wonderful people in my life. 

je vous aime tous! avec beaucoup d'amour soeur alicia hawkes