The Decision

I have always wanted to serve a mission. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to wear that missionary name tag, so when President Monson announced the missionary age change last October I was thrown a curveball. A mission was definitely something I wanted but I never imagined it could be this soon! I was immediately filled with panic and excitement. The only thing I could think was, "I could be gone this time next year. I could be on a mission." For many of my friends they got an immediate witness that they should serve a mission. I on the other hand, did not.

I always over analyze EVERYTHING. It's just, unfortunately, who I am. So making the decision to serve a mission was not an easy one. I weighed all my options, I prayed, I fasted, I talked it over and over and over with anyone who would listen to me. Those few months trying to decide were the most difficult. I was expecting a big huge answer-a choir of angels and a burst of light singing to me YES! Go! But there never was one so I thought Heavenly Father wasn't giving me an answer and I was so lost and I was so terrified that I was going to make the wrong decision. Finally my Mom shared this quote with me.

           What do you do when you have prepared carefully, have prayed fervently, waited a reasonable time for a response and still do not feel an answer? You may want to express thanks when that occurs for it is evidence of HIs trust. When you are living worthily and your choice is consistent with the Savior's teachings and you need to act, proceed with trust. As you are sensitive to the promptings of the Spirit one of two things will occur at the appropriate time: either stupor of thought will come indicating an improper choice or the peace or the burning of the bosom will be felt confirming that your choice was correct. When you are living righteously and are acting with trust God will not let you proceed too far without a warning impression if you have made a wrong decision. -Elder Scott (April 2007)

And suddenly I knew that God trusted me to make the right decision. So I finally decided and turned in my papers. Now I realize that God didn't give me a huge grand answer so that I could learn to trust not only Him but also myself. So I could rely more on the Holy Ghost and the quiet promptings I receive. 

On April 27th, I opened my calling to serve a mission. I am called to serve in the PARIS FRANCE Mission!!!! I couldn't believe it!! I am beyond thrilled to serve the people of France!! That very day I started my countdown-143 days until the MTC. I'm currently down to 44 days. And I've never been so excited in my life!! I know that what I'm doing is exactly what Heavenly Father wants me to do. I can't wait to serve Him and His children and to spread the wonderful knowledge and truth that I have!